THE POWER OF SUGGESTION

(Full Article)

Estimated Read Time: 12 minutes
Reading Level: Grade 7 to Grade 9



How Words, Thoughts, and Energy Reprogram the Subconscious

The Invisible Force You Are Using Every Day

Before You Read This…

You may catch yourself thinking of other people who need it.
Your partner. Your kids. Your ex.
Your teammates. Your parents.
Your boss. Your coach. Someone who never listens.

You might be right.
But before you go down that path, hear this part clearly.

We all need it.

You probably think I need this work too.
You are bang on.
I did.
And I still do every single day.

The only reason I can confidently write this is because I have lived it.
I have been the guy who reacted too fast.
The guy whose tone could change a room in one second.
The guy who carried old wounds into new seasons.
The guy who spoke from fear without knowing it.

I have torn myself apart and rebuilt the inside slowly and deliberately.
Daily reps.
Quiet reflection.
Hard corrections.
Uncomfortable honesty.

I correct my tone on purpose.
I correct my posture on purpose.
I look at my triggers before I blame anyone for them.
I pay attention to my breath, my reactions, my edges.
I question old stories my past tries to hand me.
I make sure I am not dumping my unfinished work onto my kids, my wife, my clients, or the athletes I coach.

This work is humbling.
It is repetitive.
It is not glamorous.
And it is the reason I can lead anyone else with any kind of integrity.

So yes.
I need this work.
I will need it tomorrow.
I will need it for the rest of my life.
Growth is not something you finish.
It is something you carry.

And with that out of the way,
Read the rest of this honestly.

This Is An Emergency

This is not a sales pitch.
Not a feel-good message.
A call for awareness before more damage gets passed on.

Because most people are asleep at the wheel.
Hurting themselves with their own voice.
Hurting their kids with inherited fear.
Hurting their partners with old trauma.
Hurting their players with pressure and manipulation.
Hurting their friends with sarcasm, they think is harmless.
Hurting their coworkers with tone they do not even notice.

All of it automatic.
All of it unexamined.
All of it preventable.

Most people have no idea how much power they hold
Or how much harm they cause with one look
one sigh
one comment
one reaction.

And here is the part no one wants to admit.
A lot of people say they are too busy to do this work.
Too busy to reflect.
Too busy to slow down.
Too busy to look inward.

But being too busy is how the pain spreads.
It is how you pass it on.
Not just to kids
but to partners
friends
teammates
employees
random people who cross your path
Anyone who absorbs the energy you do not manage.

Being busy is not the problem.
Avoiding the work is.

If you do not make time for awareness,
your reactions will run your life for you.
They will show up in moments you cannot afford.
They will cost you more than the work ever would.

This is your friendly wake-up call.
If you do not take responsibility for your own programming
You will pass on pain that was never meant to be passed at all.

The Holidays Will Test All Of This

And the holidays are coming.
More drinks.
More pressure.
More chaos.

It is the time of year when we can hide behind the parties, the dinners, the noise, pretending everything is fine.

But January and February sneak up fast.
The truth shows up once the lights come down.
When the decorations go back in the box
Your patterns remain.

If you are not in control of your reactions before the holidays hit
Your reactions will take control of you afterward.

And if you think a new year will magically fix this
It will not.
Hope is not a plan.
Time is not a strategy.
Avoidance is not growth.

Nothing changes unless you change it.
Not your voice.
Not your behaviour.
Not your triggers.
Not your life.

Every Time You Speak, You Shape Reality

Every time you open your mouth, you are programming the world around you.
Every look, sigh, tone, and gesture sends a message to others
and to yourself.

We think words disappear when we are done speaking
but they do not.
They stick.
They live in the subconscious.

The subconscious does not debate.
It does not filter.
It does not negotiate.
It accepts.
It obeys.

Say “You look tired”
and the mind quietly agrees.

Say “I am terrible with names”
and the brain builds a filter to ensure that is true.

Say “I am confident”
and your body moves differently.

This is not magic.
This is neurobiology.

The Subconscious Runs Your Life

The subconscious runs about ninety-five percent of your life.
It is the silent operating system behind your habits, beliefs, fears, and performance.

Someone says, “You have aged.”
And your conscious mind shrugs it off
But your subconscious goes hunting.

You catch yourself staring in the mirror
finding wrinkles that were always there
but never mattered.
Finding grey hairs under fluorescent lights.
Pulling at your face.
Searching for evidence.

This is the Reticular Activating System.
The brain’s filter.
It looks for what it has been told to look for.
And it always finds something.

Same with weight.
Same with health.
Same with beauty.
Same with confidence.

We have been trained since childhood to believe beauty and health look a certain way.
Not because it is true
because repetition builds belief.

Advertising.
Family comments.
Schoolyard comparisons.
Social media.

The subconscious does not argue with repetition.

There are extremes.
If you weigh four hundred pounds and call it healthy
That is denial.
But living obsessed with scales and mirrors
is its own sickness.

Health is behaviour.
Beauty is energy.
Both start with awareness of the story your subconscious is running.

Why We Say What We Say

People love pointing out flaws.

A red spot. “What is that?”
Bags under your eyes. “Rough night.”
A cough. “You sick?”
A pimple. “What happened to your face?”
A yawn. “Someone is tired.”
A haircut. “Why did you do that? I liked it before.”
A quiet mood. “What is wrong with you today?”

They think they are helping.
They are not.

It is not compassion.
It is control.
Their fear is thrown onto you.

Illness.
Age.
Fatigue.
Insecurity.

Your nervous system absorbs it, especially if you carry trauma, grief, anxiety, or a history of loss.

One small comment can flip you into panic.

This is how trauma gets passed along.
One comment at a time.

These moments shape how we see people.
We stop seeing the person
We only see the flaw.

We do not see things as they are.
We see them as we are.
Awareness changes everything.

Parents: How We Pass It On

Parents do this constantly.
Often without intent.
Often thinking they are protecting.

We overreact.
Overanalyze.
Micromanage.
Point out problems that are not problems.

“You look tired.”
“You look pale.”
“You're acting weird.”

We call it love.
But it is fear.
Our fear.
Not theirs.

Kids learn about the world through their parents.
Your nervous system becomes their blueprint.
Your tone becomes their inner voice.
Your reactions become their instincts.

Ask yourself honestly:
Do you want your trauma passed on?
Or do you want your kids to inherit calm, confidence, and trust?

We cannot protect kids from every wound
But we can stop handing them ours.

Sport: Leadership or Manipulation

I have lived this part more than I wish I had.
I fell victim to it.
I was part of it.
I drank that Kool-Aid once.
It is something I have to live with.
Something I carry.
Something I refuse to repeat.

My whole life has been in baseball.
I have seen the absolute best coaches
And I have seen the worst.

Leadership is honesty.
Consistency.
Accountability.
It is telling the truth even when it costs you money or popularity.
It is shaping young people for the long run, not just the lineup card this weekend.

Manipulation is something else entirely.
Selling dreams to kids because it pays the bills.
Telling parents what they want to hear
instead of what their child actually needs.
Using hope as bait.
Using insecurity as leverage.

I have seen coaches lie to parents just to keep them paying.
I have seen development used as a marketing word.
I have seen instructors pretend to care while counting invoices behind the scenes.
And I have seen kids lose trust in the game
because an adult needed control more than the truth.

That is the part that still bothers me.
The part I cannot unsee.
The part I promised myself I would never take part in again.

A real coach does not play with dreams.
A real coach does not use fear, flattery, or fake hype.
A real coach tells the truth, builds the player, and stands firm on values
even when it is inconvenient.

Real coaches build character.
They build identity.
They build resilience.

Not invoices.

How You Suggest Without Knowing

These phrases sound like concern
But they land like identity.

You seem off
You look tired
You have been quiet
You are not yourself
You are too emotional
You used to be motivated
You have changed
You look pale
You always do this
You never do that

These are directions.
Not observations.

“You seem off” tells the nervous system something is wrong.
“You look tired,” tells the body to drop energy.
“You have changed” triggers defence and self-doubt.

Once heard
The mind looks for proof.

That is how people become what they have been told.

People say this feels like gaslighting.
It is not exactly gaslighting
But it can feel the same.
Gaslighting is intentional.
This is unconscious.
But the subconscious does not care about intent.
It absorbs the message and builds reality around it.

Why We Accept These Suggestions

We accept what matches our past.
Old wounds.
Old patterns.
Old labels.

If you grew up being told you were too emotional
It takes very little to trigger that belief again.

If your parents were anxious
Neutral comments feel like danger.

We are not trying to erase these triggers.
We are trying to recognize them.

Awareness turns reaction into choice.
Willingness makes change possible.

The Science of What I Am Doing

I know this is a lot.
But this is the work.
This is where change actually lives.

I am a coach.
A dad.
A guy obsessed with how behaviour, identity, and the brain shape our lives.

I have changed my language on purpose.
I have corrected my tone on purpose.
I have adjust my posture, breath, and reactions on purpose.

Not for perfection.
For conditioning.
For rewiring.

This is neuroplasticity.
This is leadership.

And yes
I charge for it.
I am not a non-profit.

Your hairdresser charges for improving your appearance.
That Botox is not cheap.
Your trainer charges for strengthening your body.

I help make the inside prettier.
And let’s be honest, that is usually why
we get fixated on the outside in the first place.

Inward work is not as fun.

You can't post it on social media.
There is no before and after picture for your self-talk.
There is no viral moment for regulating your nervous system.
There is no applause for choosing honesty over ego.

But this is the work that lasts.
This is the part that actually changes your life.

You Have A Choice

Right now,
you are training your subconscious.
Every thought is a rep.
Every reaction is a rep.
Every word is a rep.

You can keep running the same old program
or build a new one.

You can keep reacting out of fear
or lead from awareness.

You can keep repeating what hurt you
or become the one who stops the cycle.

The 60-Day ARC 

Rewire Your Subconscious

If this hit you, it is because you live it.

The shift in tone that changes a room.
The sigh that kills momentum.
The comment that lingers too long.
The nervous system that reacts before the mind decides.

The Power of Suggestion: The 60-Day ARC
It was built for exactly this.

It is not fake positivity.
It is not pretending everything is fine.
It is awareness.
Language.
Energy.
Identity.

What the First 30 Days Look Like

The first month is about catching the truth.
You cannot change what you cannot see.

The first 30 days train you to:

• Notice your tone before it fires

• Catch the old stories before they run your reactions

• Understand your nervous system instead of fighting it

• Interrupt the patterns that have been running your life for years

• Become aware of the unconscious language you use on yourself

• Identify where your self-talk came from

• See how suggestion shapes every part of your day
  

This month is the wake-up.
The part where you suddenly realize how often fear, anxiety, impatience, or old wounds are in the driver’s seat.

It is uncomfortable.
It is eye-opening.
It is where the real shift begins.

And this timing matters.
Because the holidays expose everything.
Your triggers.
Your habits.
Your relationship to pressure, family, routine, and escape.

This is the perfect time to see the patterns clearly
Instead of pretending they are not there.

What the Second 30 Days Look Like

The second month is where you rebuild.
This is where the new language, new identity, and new presence get trained into your life.

These 30 days guide you to:

• Regulate your nervous system under real pressure

• Replace reactive language with grounded language

• Build self-talk that supports your goals instead of sabotaging them

• Lead your home, team, or relationships with calm authority

• Create emotional consistency instead of emotional whiplash

• Strengthen your ability to pause before reacting

• Shift from fear-based communication to conscious communication
  

This is where you begin to feel different.
Where people around you notice a change without you saying a word.
Where your energy becomes clearer, stronger, and more stable.

And this is why the timing is perfect.
You do not stumble into 2026 hoping it starts better.
You enter it already rewired.
Already grounded.
Already in motion.
Already building the habits, presence, and mindset you want to carry into the year.

Hope is not a plan.
Preparation is.
Identity is.
Awareness is.

This is why the program is framed the way it is.
You end the year with clarity.
You start the next one with momentum.
And you carry both forward as a new way of living.

What You Will Actually Learn

You will learn to:

Catch and redirect the language controlling your life.
Recognize when trauma and old programming are driving behaviour.
Regulate your nervous system under pressure.
Lead your home, team, or self with grounded presence.
Replace judgment with awareness.
Build self-talk that finally works for you.
Break generational patterns instead of repeating them.

This is how change actually happens.
This is how you stop passing trauma forward.
This is how you turn coaching into leadership.
This is how you become the example instead of the echo.

Can you be that change?
Do you want to?